


forever i roam, further from home (but your hand i hold)

by totaltrashmammal



Series: the softer the skin, the sharper the teeth (jovana petra todd) [4]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Red Hood/Arsenal (Comics)
Genre: (he wants to apologize. jovana doesn't trust him), Black Widow Jason Todd, Dick's Canon Treatment of Baby Robin Jason, F/F, Female Jason Todd, Female Roy Harper, Hes sorta of an asshole, Increased to the MAX, Jealous Dick Grayson, Short and Sweetish, Traumatized Lesbians Cuddling, Winter Soldier Roy Harper, and, bi girls, but in this case, but like, jayroy: traumatized bi boys, tm - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 05:01:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26467639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/totaltrashmammal/pseuds/totaltrashmammal
Summary: If Jovana thought the Joker ruined her, then the Red Room destroyed her. Rhea makes it better, just as Jovana knows that she calms Rhea's own demons about Hydra. Neither of them are okay but with each other? They could be, one day. Jovana's looking forward to that day. When she can hold Rhea without worrying about the next target or how red her hands will be in the soft morning light.For Female Jason Todd Week, Day Four, Free Day
Relationships: Roy Harper/Jason Todd, Talia al Ghul & Jason Todd
Series: the softer the skin, the sharper the teeth (jovana petra todd) [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1919677
Comments: 11
Kudos: 54
Collections: FemJay Week 2020





	forever i roam, further from home (but your hand i hold)

Jovana curled up on the cheap motel sheets, breathing out softly as her eyes traced Rhea’s face. The other girl had fallen asleep hours ago, a soft smile easing the hard lines of her resting face. The smile had made Jay look forward to the future for once, instead of their harsh reality of day to day surviving, fighting for their freedom from their collective demons, trying to escape the trauma that drenched them to the bones. 

Jovana wasn’t thinking of the Red Room right now. She wasn’t thinking of the way that Bruce had looked when he saw her again or the red that pooled out of Talia’s stomach. Jay was thinking of the way Rhea’s hair splayed fire across the pillowcase, how her collarbones peeked through her oversized shirt, and how her lips exhaled every breath. 

She was committing the freckles that were dusted over Rhea’s cheekbones to memory when there was a slight hitch in her next inhale. Jovana glanced up, seeing pale green eyes staring back at her. There was no need waiting for her to slowly wake up. Neither of them had that luxury, hadn’t had it for a long time. She blew out a breath, the sound echoing in their little bubble of temporary paradise, and stretched her hand out across the sheets. 

Rhea entangled her fingers between her own cool metal ones and Jay shivered but grasped tighter when she made a move to pull back. Rhea smiled, the real one, the one that never failed to make Jovana’s heart skip a beat. Jay smiled back and shifted to try and find comfort in the itchy sheets. Rhea made a soft sound, the teasing disapproving cluck of her tongue, before drawing closer. 

The sheets didn’t make a noise as she moved, but years of training to be the deadliest beasts in the room had taught them to stay silent. Rhea tossed a leg over Jovana and brought their entwined arms over her waist. The weight made Jay feel a little more real, eased the tightening feeling in her chest.

“Why are you awake, angel?”

Rhea hid her words in her shoulder, the sound slightly muffled by Jovana’s bare flesh. It still broke the comfortable silence they were basking in, brought them back to the living world, to the muffled yells of drunkards, the honks and engines of the cars roaring past. It made the colored lights falling across their rented bed a little more real. She hated the reminder that this night would end and felt her hands tighten around Rhea’s. Jay tilted her head, settling once she and Rhea were a few inches away, sharing breaths. 

Her lover’s eyes were expectant, a questioning tint in the crook of her eyebrows, her lips pursed.

“I want to make every moment between the two of us count.” She confessed in the dark, eyes downcast “I don’t want to miss a single second of you. Of us.” Rhea’s eyes softened and she leaned forward to press a chaste kiss to Jay’s full mouth. Jovana sighed contentedly, her free hand coming up to cradle her cheek. She didn’t know how long they stayed there, trading kisses like stolen currency as they hid from the world. Both of them knew that this fragile peace would end as their pursuers caught up to them, but for now, they could stay tangled in the off-white sheets that had seen too much. 

Jovana pressed her forehead against Rhea’s, closing her eyes and thinking of their past, dreaming of their future. Jovana had thought idealistic daydreams had been beaten out of her but ever since Jay met Rhea in that horrible place, she had started to dream again. She had thought she was hallucinating, a new drug from her captors for her to overcome, the first time that she saw Rhea striding through the Red Room. 

She couldn’t make sense of why else Dick’s ex-friend that had gone missing at seventeen would show up in her hell. Jay had quickly pushed the incident away as her thoughts began to stray towards Bruce and the life she had at the manor. She didn’t need those memories anymore, it only made the passing time without rescue hurt more. Made Dick’s last words to her truthful. 

The second time she saw her, it was in the middle of ballet training and she faltered in her pirouette. Ra’s beat her bloody, leaving her gasping on the freezing concrete. She had kept an eye on Rhea throughout the entire punishment but the girl stayed frighteningly solid. As Jovana dragged herself to the edge of the room to assess her injuries, Ra’s introduced Rhea to the rest of the girls, who were still running through the ballet routine with no sign of stopping. 

“This is the Winter Soldier. She will be assisting in your training. Treat her as you would me.” 

Those abrupt words changed something in Jay. Learning of Rhea’s amnesia hurt worse. The assassin never once recognized her, as she beat her into the concrete to make her stronger, make her _unbreakable_. When Jovana graduated the Red Room, killing off the other weaker trainees, she thought that Rhea’s eyes flashed. 

She didn’t care by then. 

Now they lay in the dark, escaping the Red Room and Hydra and both of their old families in an attempt to find peace. “I want a cat.” She broke the silence suddenly, shaking off that train of thought. “Mmm?” Rhea murmured back, blinking her eyes back open. Jovana nodded, a smile playing on her lips. “When we get a house. I want a cat. And maybe a snake.” 

“Only if I get a hedgehog. “ She yawned, “Or three.” Jay pressed a kiss to her cheek, the smile finally breaking through. “As many as you want.” She promised. She nestled her head in Rhea’s neck and closed her eyes. Thinking of pets made thoughts of Ace pop up in her head. She could barely believe it when Bruce actually got her a dog after she had asked, even if Bruce had supposedly gotten Ace for the purpose of being a guard dog.

But a guard dog only worked if the threat was at home. Still, as the crowbar rained down upon her body, she had imagined that Ace would feel her pain and find her somehow. That Ace would leap through the door snarling as he took down the Joker. 

Jovana should’ve known better than to take the Joker on alone but she had wanted to prove herself. When Dick strolled into her room that evening, all cruel smirks and cold eyes as he tossed an old Robin uniform at her, she had believed him when he said that as he was Batman for the night, he needed a Robin to patrol with him. 

Instead Dick had left her in the Narrows, clad in the too-small uniform and shivering as the frigid air caressed her bare legs. She didn’t have any of the gadgets that Dick had. He had taken away the grapple gun with a sneer, telling her she had to earn it. Her eagerness to get Dick’s approval left her smack dab in the middle of Crime Alley, attracting all the wrong sorts of attention. 

Meanwhile, Batman and Robin were flying through a different part of the city. Dick had lied, Bruce wasn’t caught up in a League meeting and he hadn’t asked Dick to patrol as Batman that night.

A small boy captured a picture of Robin laughing joyfully that night as he backflipped through the air. 

Talia, the pride and joy of the Red Room, had taken notice of the crying girl. Talia had followed in the shadows, observing as Jovana was overpowered by goons and brought to the Joker. She watched with cool indifference as Jovana was beaten, only stepping in when the Joker’s hand strayed to cause a different sort of pain. 

Within seconds, the men were defeated as Talia cradled Jovana to her side, crooning softly and petting her hair with a bloody hand. Talia had saved her but in the end, Jovana took her life. Ra’s would accept nothing less. Their last time together was a cruel mockery of their meeting, only it was Jovana with the bloody hands. Talia had never stopped smiling as Jovana slid the blade into her heart. Her last words were a soft ‘I don’t blame you.’

Jovana blamed herself.

That was the final straw for her and Jovana broke apart from the Red Room, taking up Talia’s beloved Black Widow legacy. Rhea sought her out a few months after, and Jovana had panicked. Most people didn’t live when the Winter Soldier hunted them down. 

Instead, Rhea collapsed to her knees, _crying_ as she clutched at Jovana’s pants. 

Almost a year later and here they were, curled up against each other in the dark. Jovana pressed a light kiss to Rhea’s neck, finding her pulse and staying there. It was a reminder that this was real and that Jovana wouldn’t wake up to a concrete room, strapped on that metal table as Ra’s doctors sterilized her. 

Things would be undoubtedly complicated in the morning. The Bats and Arrows were closing in on them. It wouldn’t be hard to sneak past them, not with their training but a few days ago, Rhea had hesitantly asked if they could see what their old families wanted. Jovana couldn’t deny her anything and her fear of the Bats crumbled at the sad look on Rhea’s face. 

Neither of them had had a chance to say goodbye, as tense as things were back then. At least Jovana had people looking for her. Rhea’s disappearance was blamed on the drugs and no one had stopped to think about if it was intentional, least of all Oliver. Rhea wanted closure, as she began to break the conditioning, finding out who Rhea Harper was and not who Hydra wanted her to be. 

Jovana wasn’t looking forward to being confronted by Bruce and Dick and all the merry new birdies he had picked up, no matter how contrite Dick seemed to be. It had hurt something awful to see Nightwing’s and the current Robin’s relationship, leaving Jovana to wonder what it was about _her_. 

But that would be an issue for tomorrow, or maybe even the next day. The Bats and Arrows were good at tracking but Jovana was better at hiding. Now though, Jovana closed her eyes, listening to the steady beat of Rhea’s pulse. Now she would fall asleep next to the love of her life, ignoring the looming threat of the Bats and have a few more hours of paradise. 

**Author's Note:**

> yeah so you know coffee-water's black widow jason? this was inspired by that. actually I wanted to make a full ass story about black widow jason/winter soldier roy but idk if I can commit we'll see. i have like a whole au planned out I just really need to sit down and focus. currently I have a 52 in Spanish and a c in history so ill be focusing on school before I get down and write it


End file.
